Lesson 1 of 6 · What is actually going wrong
The one sentence
Noticing only this week. Nothing to raise with anybody yet.
The move
Watching one week without fixing it
5 minutes or less
- For one week, notice what happens in the ordinary moments rather than in the arguments.
- Count roughly how often one of you makes a small overture and the other turns towards it.
- Do not raise it, do not measure them out loud, and do not keep a chart they can see.
- At the end of the week you will know whether the problem is the arguments or the days between them.
If it does not work
If a week of watching makes you angrier, stop watching and go to the repair lesson. Observation is a tool and it is not compulsory.
Write the one sentence
A specific plan works better than a good intention. Fill both halves in your own words.
When
I will
Put it in your calendar
Pick a day and a time and you will get a calendar file to open. Nothing is sent anywhere.
Kept in this browser only.