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Areas › Anger › The fear underneath anger
That cuts two ways for you. Yours is showing when you are sure you are hiding it, and people answer what they see rather than what you meant. And when you catch it on somebody else, your body has already responded before you decided anything, which is worth remembering before you treat that response as evidence.
We shall certainly test you with fear and hunger (Quran 2:155). Fear is listed alongside hunger among ordinary human conditions, which is where this equipment belongs too.
البقرة
وَلَنَبۡلُوَنَّكُم بِشَيۡءࣲ مِّنَ ٱلۡخَوۡفِ وَٱلۡجُوعِ وَنَقۡصࣲ مِّنَ ٱلۡأَمۡوَٰلِ وَٱلۡأَنفُسِ وَٱلثَّمَرَٰتِۗ وَبَشِّرِ ٱلصَّٰبِرِينَ
We shall certainly test you with fear and hunger, and loss of property, lives, and crops. But [Prophet], give good news to those who are steadfast
Qur’an 2:155read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
In a placebo-controlled experiment, women with borderline personality disorder saw anger in ambiguous faces more quickly and with stronger amygdala responses than others, and oxytocin reduced that sensitivity. Reading anger in a face happens fast, and how fast varies between people. It was a small study in one group, so it says more about the process than about how common the difference is.
Bertsch K, Gamer M, Schmidt B, Schmidinger I, Walther S, Kästel T, Schnell K, Büchel C, Domes G, Herpertz SC. (2013). Oxytocin and reduction of social threat hypersensitivity in women with borderline personality disorder.. The American journal of psychiatry doi
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
A signal everybody reads without learning gets read very fast and without checking.
Not every threat needs answering. A knock to your pride is not a danger to your safety, and it does not require a defence.
Some of the fights you take up for other people are your own old fight, unfinished, borrowed onto somebody else's ground.
If you genuinely cannot remember what you said, that is often true rather than a dodge. Under a big surge of stress the part of the brain that writes the story goes quiet, while the part that records the feeling gets louder.