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Areas › Anger › Cool the body first
Balm, a menthol stick, cold water on the wrists: the substance is not really the point. What helps is a mild, unusual sensation you can keep returning to, and the fact that it sits near your breath so you notice the breathing as well. Try it on a quiet evening first, so it is familiar before you need it.
It is He who sends the winds as heralds of good news before His Mercy. We send down pure water from the sky (Quran 25:48). Cooling and washing arrive here as relief, which is roughly the job a cold dab of anything is doing.
الفرقان
وَهُوَ ٱلَّذِيٓ أَرۡسَلَ ٱلرِّيَٰحَ بُشۡرَۢا بَيۡنَ يَدَيۡ رَحۡمَتِهِۦۚ وَأَنزَلۡنَا مِنَ ٱلسَّمَآءِ مَآءࣰ طَهُورࣰ ا
It is He who sends the winds as heralds of good news before His Mercy. We send down pure water from the sky
Qur’an 25:48read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
In a randomised controlled trial comparing self guided physical activity, mindfulness meditation and slow breathing biofeedback, all three reduced stress and improved wellbeing to a similar degree. That suggests the choice can follow whatever you will actually keep doing. It also means nobody should be promising you that one particular trick is the special one.
van der Zwan JE, de Vente W, Huizink AC, Bögels SM, de Bruin EI. (2015). Physical activity, mindfulness meditation, or heart rate variability biofeedback for stress reduction: a randomized controlled trial.. Applied psychophysiology and biofeedback doi
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
A steady physical sensation gives your attention somewhere to go besides the person annoying you.
Anger is the most physical of the feelings. It goes straight into the muscles, so talking yourself out of it while your arms are already ready to move is hard work.
Most of what sets you off is meaning rather than sensation: somebody's tone, a look you have seen before, what you take it to say about you.
Counting to ten asks you to keep track of numbers at the exact moment you cannot keep track of anything. Breathe out slowly instead and let the breath do the delaying.