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Areas › Anger › Cool the body first
Irritability is part of depression, and it belongs to the mixed and elevated states of bipolar disorder too. Anger skills are still worth having, and on their own they will not do much if what is driving the anger is a mood that needs treating. The clue is usually timing: a temper that arrived with a whole change in sleep, energy and outlook is a different thing from one that has always been there.
Give you sleep for rest (Quran 78:9). Sleep is named as a provision, so when it stops doing its work that is worth taking seriously rather than pushing through.
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
In a randomised controlled trial with Latino adults who had both asthma and panic disorder, a culturally adapted programme that treated both together, combining CBT with heart rate variability biofeedback, did better than music and relaxation therapy. It is a different pair of conditions, so the specifics do not carry over. The principle does: where two things sit on top of each other, treating both deliberately beat treating around them.
Feldman JM, Matte L, Interian A, Lehrer PM, Lu SE, Scheckner B, Steinberg DM, Oken T, Kotay A, Sinha S, Shim C. (2016). Psychological treatment of comorbid asthma and panic disorder in Latino adults: Results from a randomized controlled trial.. Behaviour research and therapy doi
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
You cannot skill your way out of a symptom that has a different cause.
If your mood has shifted markedly, or there are thoughts of harming yourself, that needs a doctor now rather than a self care practice.
Look along a shelf of anger books and the advice converges: bring the body down first. Mostly what differs is the packaging, so take whichever version you will actually use.
Deliberation has liberation sitting inside it. Cheap as wordplay, but it is the point: the space you take before you act is the freedom you have.
Take slow sips of water. You have to hold your breath for a moment to swallow, so your breathing slows down without you having to manage it.