Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

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12 practices

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Two stretches of childhood carry most of this: the first years of school, and the middle years around the move to secondary. Knowing that lets you prepare instead of react.

The early wobble is usually about being apart from home for a long day for the first time. The later one lands when peer opinion becomes the loudest…

Five minutesThe cost of avoidingCBTQur’an 3:186One line of research

The same breathing serves different jobs at different times. Early on it may be there to help you sleep and stay contained. Later it may be there to help you feel more, not less.

This is worth knowing so you do not judge yourself for finding a practice useful now that was useless six months ago, or the other way round. In the…

Five minutesBreathingBody basedQur’an 4:103One line of research

If stopping has been harder for you than it seems to be for other people, that is worth taking seriously rather than reading as a flaw in your character.

Some people are working against more than a habit. The thing they are giving up was quietly doing a job for them, holding attention steady or keeping…

Five minutesWhen you use something to copeMedical and treatmentQur’an 4:28One line of research

Where there is a choice, take the class that meets at a fixed hour with other people in the room. Watch it whenever you like turns into never watched more often than anyone admits.

A live class hands you three things for nothing: a time, other people present, and someone who notices you are missing. A recorded course strips all…

Five minutesSystems for daily lifeADHD skillsQur’an 5:2

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.

One line of research

Teenage memories of this often come with a sting: the year you worked out how much longer everything took you than it seemed to take everybody else.

That is usually why adolescence is the period people can describe in detail. The work got harder, the scaffolding of primary school fell away, and…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 94:5One line of research

The first week or so on one of these can feel worse rather than better: jittery, restless, sleeping badly. For most people it settles within a fortnight, and it is a known part of starting rather than a sign of harm.

Untold, a person quite reasonably concludes the medicine is making them ill and stops. Told beforehand, the same week becomes something to sit out,…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 94:5One line of research

Hear this before you start rather than after: change here is gradual. Habits built over twenty years do not come apart in three weeks.

Waiting is genuinely harder with ADHD, and a treatment whose reward is months away is exactly the sort of thing that gets dropped in week five.…

Five minutesTreatment and medicationMedical and treatmentQur’an 20:114One line of research

When a decision feels impossible, put a date on it rather than pressing for the commitment. We will try this and look at it again in three months turns a life sentence back into a choice.

Plenty of people hear any decision as permanent, so picking a course or a job or a city feels like sentencing themselves to it. A review date changes…

Five minutesLiving with uncertaintyCBTQur’an 18:23One line of research

The parts of the brain that plan and hold back keep developing into the mid twenties, so the person struggling at nineteen is not the finished version. Real gains come with time, though they do not add up to becoming someone without ADHD.

Hold that both ways. It is a reason for patience, and for not writing anybody off at nineteen. It is also a reason to plan for ongoing management…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 23:14One line of research

ADHD tends to surface at the points where life asks for more organising: a new school year with seven teachers, the first term at university, a first job, a promotion into managing other people.

The pattern is always the same. Something that was holding things together is removed, or the amount you have to run yourself goes up, and what was…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 2:286One line of research

Things often seem to get worse in the weeks after a diagnosis. Usually nothing has got worse. You are simply seeing what was always there, and now you have a name to hang it on.

You will start joining things up: the lost keys, the half finished projects, the reason that job ended. It can feel like the diagnosis broke…

Five minutesWhat ADHD actually isADHD skillsQur’an 51:21One line of research

Neurofeedback usually starts with an assessment, then a block of sessions, then a review, and it is mostly paid for privately. Ask about all of that before you begin.

It is a referral rather than something your therapist adds to a session, so you are taking on a second appointment, a second bill and a second…

Five minutesYour nervous systemMedical and treatmentQur’an 78:11One line of research