Areas › Grief and loss

Grief and loss

Grief is not a problem to be solved and it does not run to a schedule. What helps is letting the wave come, keeping the bond rather than severing it, and being cared for while you carry it.

What works for this

Continuing bonds and the dual process model

There are no stages and you are not behind. Grieving is moving back and forth between facing the loss and dealing with everything the loss changed, and the days you cannot face it are part of that movement rather than a failure of it.

One move, today

Let today be whichever of the two it wants to be. If it is a day for dealing with the practical things rather than the loss, that is the model working and not avoidance.

What matches

2 practices

Narrow these down

On the heaviest day, trust you are not given more than you can carry, and do just the next small thing.

You do not have to carry the whole weight at once. One small act, then the next, is enough.

A minuteCare for yourself in lossGriefQur’an 2:286One line of research

Grief is tiring. Let yourself rest and return to small routines; this is not giving up on them.

Stepping back to eat, sleep, and do ordinary things is part of grieving, not a betrayal of it.

Twenty minutesCare for yourself in lossGriefQur’an 25:47One line of research

Learn this in order

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