Lesson 5 of 6 · What feeds it
One. Asking again
This is the most socially acceptable feeder there is, because from outside it looks like a religious person seeking knowledge, and everybody involved is being sincere.
It behaves the way checking behaves. The relief is real, the relief is short, and the need comes back a little bigger. The scholar answering has no idea they are part of a loop, and would be upset to hear it.
This is information and it is not an instruction. Nobody here is telling you to stop asking, and stopping abruptly on your own is not something a page can talk you through safely. Knowing what the asking is doing is the useful part for now, and lesson six is about who does the rest of it with you.
What the research says
Asking for reassurance works exactly like checking: it lowers the distress now and keeps the doubt alive over time. The relief is real and it is short, and that is the whole trap.
Reassurance seeking behaves like overt checking. It lowers distress in the moment and keeps the doubt going over time.
Parrish CL, Radomsky AS (2010). Why do people seek reassurance and check repeatedly? An investigation of factors involved in compulsive behavior in OCD and depression. Journal of Anxiety Disorders, 24(2), 211 to 222
Clinical guidance treats asking a religious authority for reassurance as a compulsion here, and brings that authority in as a collaborator rather than cutting them off. Which is why nothing above tells you to stop speaking to yours.
Describes reassurance seeking from a religious authority as a compulsion in this presentation, and describes the authority being brought in as a collaborator rather than being cut off. Which is why nothing above tells you to stop asking.
Huppert JD, Siev J (2010). Treating scrupulosity in religious individuals using cognitive-behavioral therapy. Cognitive and Behavioral Practice, 17(4), 382 to 392 doi