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Areas › Focus, starting, and ADHD › Screens and attention
The child who cannot settle is the child most likely to be put in front of a screen so that dinner gets cooked. A parent who is scattered themselves reaches for the same solution to buy twenty quiet minutes. None of this makes screens harmless and none of it takes away the case for limits. It does mean the guilt many parents carry, about having caused something, is heavier than the evidence asks for.
The love of desirable things is made alluring (Quran 3:14). The pull is described as built into the display, which is a kinder place to start than assuming a family simply lacked discipline.
آل عمران
زُيِّنَ لِلنَّاسِ حُبُّ ٱلشَّهَوَٰتِ مِنَ ٱلنِّسَآءِ وَٱلۡبَنِينَ وَٱلۡقَنَٰطِيرِ ٱلۡمُقَنطَرَةِ مِنَ ٱلذَّهَبِ وَٱلۡفِضَّةِ وَٱلۡخَيۡلِ ٱلۡمُسَوَّمَةِ وَٱلۡأَنۡعَٰمِ وَٱلۡحَرۡثِۗ ذَٰلِكَ مَتَٰعُ ٱلۡحَيَوٰةِ ٱلدُّنۡيَاۖ وَٱللَّهُ عِندَهُۥ حُسۡنُ ٱلۡمَـَٔابِ
The love of desirable things is made alluring for men- women, children, gold and silver treasures piled up high, horses with fine markings, livestock, and farmland- these may be the joys of this life, but God has the best place to return to
Qur’an 3:14read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
A widely cited set of findings comes from self-report measures where heavier media multitasking went along with more everyday attention failures, more cognitive errors and more mind wandering. The authors describe that as an association rather than a demonstrated cause, and the measures are people's own accounts of themselves. Worth knowing before anyone tells you the research proves screens made your child inattentive.
Ralph BC, Thomson DR, Cheyne JA, Smilek D. (2014). Media multitasking and failures of attention in everyday life.. Psychological research doi
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
When two things move together, the more distractible child may simply be the one who ends up with the screen.
Gaming for an hour before you start the work almost never costs an hour. Do the thing that has to be done first, then the thing you want.
Try one hour with the phone away and out of reach, then talk about what came up. The hour itself is the information.
Things posted in ten seconds have got young people excluded from school, and worse. It is worth asking about online conduct in the same routine way you would ask about anything else that could go badly.