Talking yourself out of anger while it is peaking rarely works. Noticing that a thought is happening costs far less than winning an argument with it.

What the research says

In a randomised experiment with 62 students, training people to use planned self talk protected their selective attention after their self control had already been worn down. Short prepared phrases seem to help attention hold, which is a different thing from reasoning your way out of a feeling. It was a small study using an attention task, so it supports a brief cue rather than a full internal debate.

Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.