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Areas › Anger › Cool the body first
At the start it feels artificial, and it should. You are choosing deliberately what the other response does for free. Give it enough repetitions and the deliberate one starts arriving first, which is the point at which the effort drops and it stops feeling like a technique.
Glorify Him morning and evening (Quran 33:42). Fixed points at both ends of the day are how a practice becomes a habit rather than a decision you have to keep making.
الأحزاب
وَسَبِّحُوهُ بُكۡرَةࣰ وَأَصِيلًا
and glorify Him morning and evening
Qur’an 33:42read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
In a randomised controlled trial, five weeks of daily breathing practice was associated with measurable changes in prefrontal structure. What such changes mean clinically is not established, and five weeks is a short window. It sits reasonably alongside the ordinary experience that a practice kept up daily starts to ask less of you.
Yoo HJ, Nashiro K, Min J, Cho C, Bachman SL, Nasseri P, Porat S, Dutt S, Grigoryan V, Choi P, Thayer JF, Lehrer PM, Chang C, Mather M. (2022). Heart rate variability (HRV) changes and cortical volume changes in a randomized trial of five weeks of daily HRV biofeedback in younger and older adults.. International journal of psychophysiology : official journal of the International Organization of Psychophysiology doi
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
What you repeat becomes what happens without asking, so it is worth pointing at something you chose.
Anger leaves fuel in the body with nowhere to go. Spend it on something physical, without replaying the argument while you do.
Slowing the breath seems to widen the gap in which you can still see your options. It does not make the anger go away, it gives you a moment inside it.
You already own this one. Let out a sigh of relief right now, on purpose, and notice that your body knew exactly what to do.