When one bit of you wants to let the feeling come and another bit is frightened of it, you are not being difficult. You are two things at once, and both of them have their reasons.

What the research says

Experimental work on social anxiety found that protective behaviours are not one thing: strategies that involved hiding oneself made interactions worse, while impression management strategies behaved differently and were not uniformly harmful. Protection varies in what it does and is worth looking at closely rather than simply removed. That research is about behaviour in social situations, not about inner conflict, so it supports the stance rather than proving it.

Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.