Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

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1158 practices

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The steadiness you are training shows up in more than your mood. Sleep, digestion and how quickly you come down after a fright tend to move together.

Worth knowing when progress on the thing you came for feels slow. People often notice they are sleeping better, or snapping less, before they notice…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 32:9One line of research

Body based practices sit alongside medication rather than replacing it. If you take something, you can do both.

They are worth having on the menu for people who cannot take medication, do not want to, or want something of their own to do as well. The skill you…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 106:4One line of research

A healthy heart rate is not a metronome. The small variations between beats are a sign your body can still adjust to what is in front of it.

Heart rate variability is exactly that: how much the gaps between beats change. More of it generally goes with a system that can speed up when needed…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 25:47One line of research

Rest your attention in the middle of your chest, let your breath slow as though it were moving in and out through there, and bring to mind something you feel warmly about.

A hand on your chest can help you find the place. The feeling does not have to be big: gratitude for something small, or the ordinary fondness you…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 13:28One line of research

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.

Practising under provocation

Food, caffeine and fuel

Making it stick

Structure and routine

Cool the body first

What worry does

Screens and attention

What you are actually defending

Treatment and medication

Growing empathy

Breathing

Fondness and admiration

Answering bids

Righteous anger and perfectionism

Being seen and judged

Shame and stigma

Feeling from the inside

Breaking the worry loop

When you use something to cope

Use your strengths

Gratitude

Shared spiritual life

Anger, alcohol and the body

Facing it a step at a time

Question the thought

When anger turns to harm

Posture and how you carry yourself

Notice the pattern and flex

Name what you feel

Rebuilding trust

Your worth is not conditional

Affection and touch

Ride the urge

Rest and pacing

Your window of tolerance

Work with your brain

Patience and trust

Obsessions and compulsions

Listen to the body

Reading, numbers and learning differences

Keep the bond

Hold a boundary

Get it out of your head

Find meaning

Face it gently

Care for yourself in loss

Rituals of connection

When you go numb

The cost of avoiding

Panic and the body

Validate yourself and others

Living with uncertainty

Listening and understanding

Slow breathing on its own does less than slow breathing with a warm feeling attached and something showing you how you are doing.

That is the difference between the deep breathing most people have tried and found underwhelming, and this. The feedback matters because otherwise…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 2:152One line of research

Practise this when you are calm and again when you are wound up. The second one is what makes it available in the moment you need it.

Skills learned in one state can be strangely hard to find in another, which is why people say they forgot to use it. Do the first round with someone…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 33:41One line of research

A skill that lives in your own body and your own phone stays with you after the appointments stop. That is worth choosing for.

Plenty of what helps during treatment ends when the relationship does. This does not. People often say afterwards that the breathing thing was the…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 50:16One line of research

Three minutes of slow breathing between one person and the next is not a break. It is part of the work.

Whoever you sit with next is reading your state before they hear a word of what you say, so arriving settled is a professional act rather than a…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 94:3One line of research

Calm is not automatically the goal, and arousal is not automatically the enemy. What you are after is a system that can move between them.

The older idea was simple: stress bad, relaxation good. It missed that the same slowing down which feels like peace when you are safe is shutdown…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 6:125One line of research

A stress response is built to finish. The rush comes up, you do something with it, and then it drains away and you are back to yourself.

The trouble is that the doing something rarely happens, because you cannot run or shout in the middle of a meeting. The aim is not to stop the surge.…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 94:2One line of research

Your stress system needs an all clear as much as it needs an alarm. What often breaks after trauma is the signal that says it is over.

Cortisol rises to get you moving, and a feedback loop is meant to notice you are safe and turn the tap off. When that loop is working badly, avoiding…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 106:4One line of research

A day has a shape. Energy up in the morning, a real dip in the early afternoon, a second lift in the evening, then down into sleep.

That early afternoon dip is normal and not a sign that you are lazy. Knowing the ordinary pattern gives you something to compare your own against,…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 6:96One line of research

Roughly four fifths of the traffic on the vagus nerve is heading up from your body to your brain. Your brain is largely reading a report from your body.

That is the strongest argument for working with the body rather than only with thoughts. If the report says danger, telling yourself a better story…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 32:9One line of research

Not all stillness is the same. One kind is braced and wide awake. The other has gone soft and far away.

In the braced kind there is high alertness and a lot of held tension: jaw set, hands tight, everything ready. In the collapsed kind the tone drops…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 6:125One line of research

The goal is not to have less energy. It is to have a brake you can feather rather than slam.

Your accelerator is not the problem. You need it for work, for lifting things, for standing up for somebody. What tends to be missing is the fine…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 6:96One line of research

There is a difference between not being upset anymore and actually being settled. The first is a rough tuning. The second is finer.

On a stringed instrument the big pegs get you near the note and the small tuners at the other end find the exact pitch, and the difference is…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 89:27One line of research

Being the baby who never cried is not the same as being secure. It can mean you learned very early that nobody was coming.

Some people regulate themselves beautifully and have never once been regulated by anybody else. From outside it reads as resilience. From inside it…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 2:248One line of research

You can tell you are back when there is choice in it again: you can pick which thought to keep hold of, and how to answer what you feel.

The settled state is not the absence of things. It has a texture: clear, connected, reasonably hopeful, able to understand somebody and to feel…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 10:62One line of research

Excitement and panic run on the same fuel. What turns it into play is feeling safe while it happens.

If you have learned to distrust your own energy, anything lively reads as a warning: a fast heart before a party, the buzz of an argument you are…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 78:11One line of research

Thinking about a feeling tends to slow it down. Feeling it in your body tends to speed it up. Between those two you have a throttle.

When someone is flooded, moving to words, naming and a little distance brings it down. When someone is flat and describing their week from behind…

Five minutesYour nervous systemBody basedQur’an 73:6One line of research