Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

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64 practices

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Awareness is knowing what needs doing and when. Motivation is doing it once you know. Nearly every app on the market solves the first one, which is why buying another one so rarely helps.

Test it with one question: at the moment it did not happen, did you know? If the answer is yes, the reminder was never the missing piece, and a…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 20:25One line of research

A man who could not get himself to bed kept his bedtime alarm upstairs, where his wife and baby were sleeping. Switching it off meant climbing the stairs, and leaving it meant waking them. The walk to the alarm was the thing he was trying to do anyway.

That is the part worth copying. Put the cue somewhere that costs something to answer, and make answering it land you where you meant to be. Anything…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 58:11One line of research

Time management is only the fit between tasks and the hours you have: planning them against time, then doing them against time. It is a skill with parts, not a verdict on what kind of person you are.

Most people arrive having already decided they are lazy, and that decision is doing them no good at all. Describing it mechanically gives you both…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 49:13One line of research

Carry the rough proportions into every ADHD assessment. Executive function difficulty in the great majority, coordination difficulty in around half, dyslexia in something like a quarter to two fifths. A workup that never asks about handwriting, sport or reading is not finished.

The behaviour problem you were called about is often the visible end of an unidentified reading or coordination difficulty. Ask what PE is like, what…

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.

Being seen and judged

The cost of avoiding

Making it stick

Breathing

Treatment and medication

Remembering to do it

Knowing your partner

When you use something to cope

Breaking the worry loop

Shared spiritual life

Facing it a step at a time

Feeling from the inside

What you are actually defending

Fondness and admiration

Righteous anger and perfectionism

Emotions as signals

Obsessions and compulsions

Tolerate distress

Answering bids

Staying regulated in conflict

Listening and understanding

Posture and how you carry yourself

Rituals of connection

Shame

Anger, alcohol and the body

Question the thought

When anger turns to harm

Rebuilding trust

Your worth is not conditional

When you go numb

Notice the pattern and flex

Repair after rupture

Rest and pacing

Panic and the body

Living with uncertainty

Get it out of your head

Act on your values

Your window of tolerance

Listen to the body

Safety and grounding

Care for yourself in loss

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 16:43One line of research

It runs the other way as well. Among children referred for dyslexia, a sizeable minority also have ADHD and many have coordination difficulties too. Whatever is written on the referral, treat it as one part of the picture.

Where the reading difficulty is severe, motor involvement is more likely to be there alongside it, which is why the first look should be wider than…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 49:6One line of research

Dyspraxia and developmental coordination disorder are the same thing carrying different passports. Search only the American term and you will miss a large European literature on assessing and helping these children.

Search both, and try the older names while you are there. It matters most when you are looking for what actually helps, since much of the…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 2:32One line of research

When a bright, talkative autistic child arrives looking mainly behavioural, look underneath for a coordination or reading difficulty. Once the first label is in place, whatever comes after tends to get filed under it and never assessed on its own.

Watch for the child who does well in conversation and badly on paper, or who is fine in class and miserable at PE. Those gaps are usually a second…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 50:16One line of research

Parents with one affected child often ask what they might do differently before the next one. Answer honestly: there are lists of suggestions in circulation, the evidence behind most of them is thin, and the question underneath is usually about blame.

Take the question seriously and take the guilt seriously alongside it. Give what is genuinely known, say plainly where recommendations run ahead of…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 2:286One line of research

Keep the tasks short, a couple of minutes each, with results back the same day. A long test given to a child who cannot sustain attention measures how long they can last, not the thing you were trying to measure.

Brevity is not a convenience you are allowing yourself. It is what keeps the data honest, and it keeps the child willing for whatever you ask next.…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 65:7One line of research

Choose the subtests that answer the question you were actually asked, and read whatever reports the family already has before adding anything of your own. Children arrive with thick folders, and they also arrive with nothing at all.

Where occupational therapy, speech and language or neuropsychology have already covered ground, do not cover it again for the sake of a complete…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 20:26One line of research

When you explain executive function to parents and teachers, four words will do: attention, reasoning, speed, memory. Each one can be worked on, and four is a number people can still repeat at the school gate a week later.

The academic models have a dozen headings and nobody outside the field retains them. A short list gives parents something to hang observations on, so…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 2:31One line of research

Ask about food two generations back. What the parents were like about it, what the grandparents were like, what the rules were at the table.

Much of how a person eats was learned long before anybody mentioned a diagnosis, and a fair amount of the shame around it was learned in the same…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 49:13One line of research

The scales worth using are the ones that ask about situations rather than symptoms alone. Home, school, work, and what actually happens in each.

A questionnaire counting how often somebody loses their keys will label half the population. What a diagnosis needs is evidence that the difficulty…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 24:61One line of research

Executive function scales ask how the week actually went. That is often more use than an afternoon of testing in a quiet room.

Office testing happens in the best conditions a person will ever meet: no interruptions, someone sitting with them, a clear finish line in sight.…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 39:9One line of research

Ask about the family properly: parents, brothers and sisters, children, then aunts, uncles and grandparents. Include drinking and drug use, in them as well as in the person sitting with you.

This tends to be the highest yield few minutes of an assessment, because the condition runs strongly in families. Relatives who were never assessed…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 12:87One line of research

The family history is not the warm up before the real assessment. Give it proper time and it will often tell you more than any single rating scale in the folder.

Walk through the family rather than asking one summary question about it. Who struggled at school, who could never sit through a meal, who changed…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 49:13One line of research

Note who is a first degree relative and who is a second, instead of writing 'runs in the family'. Parents, children and siblings sit in one ring. Grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins sit in the next.

A simple grid helps: names down the side, then relation, what they were like, what was ever diagnosed, what was ever treated. The picture comes out…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 58:11One line of research

Ask whether anyone kept the old school reports. The same lines turn up generation after generation: not working to potential, talks too much, never has the right books with him.

They were written by teachers who had never heard of ADHD, about children nobody was going to assess, and that is exactly what makes them worth…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 96:5One line of research

'I am disorganised' cannot be treated. 'The post piles up on the hall table until something ends up with a debt collector' can. Spend the time getting the problem down to something that specific.

Push for the particulars: which task, which moment, what was happening just before, what they did instead. Where you can, ask someone who was there…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 2:31One line of research

For the child who flies off the handle at noise, labels and crowded rooms, with no autism diagnosis in the picture, a free parent completed sensitivity questionnaire will tell you more than another behaviour chart.

It gives you a structured way to describe the reactivity without reaching for a diagnosis the child may not have, and it points at what to change:…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 4:28One line of research