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Your body
You cannot think your way out of a body that is braced. This area starts there: the breath, the ground under you, moving, eating, resting, and the small physical things that change how the rest of the day lands.
What works for this
Working from the body first
A body that has not slept, eaten or moved has less left over for holding itself steady. Changing the state you are in is often faster than changing the thoughts you are having, and it is more reliable when you are already worn out.
One move, today
A long slow out breath, longer than the in breath, three times. The out breath is the part that does the work.
What matches
235 practicesA child struggling with attention, anxiety and daily reflux at once may be dealing with one problem wearing three coats. Undiagnosed coeliac disease and other food reactions can produce all of it, and the gut symptom is the clue worth following.
Symptoms that arrive together are worth asking about together. If reading, mood and stomach all went wrong over the same period, that pattern is…
Cutting artificial preservatives out can genuinely help a child who reacts to them, because a child who feels unwell behaves worse. What it does not do is treat the ADHD underneath, which will still be there once they feel better.
Worth being clear with yourself about what you are hoping for, because these diets are expensive and hard to keep up. If your child does have…
Gluten free and dairy free eating is essential in coeliac disease and in a genuine milk allergy. Neither one treats ADHD, and putting a child on them without a reason carries costs of its own.
The cost is not only money and nutrition. It is the birthday party where they cannot have the cake and the lunch table where their food is different…
Stand on one leg for a few breaths. Your body has to work to keep you upright, and that work is loud enough to feel on a day when nothing else registers.
Balance pulls in the joints, the inner ear and the muscles all at once, so it gives a far stronger signal than sitting still and hoping to notice…
There is more than one way to feel your body. The outward senses, the inward signals like hunger and tension, and the sense of where your limbs are in space are separate channels, and on a hard day one of them will be easier than the others.
If tuning into your chest feels like too much, that is worth knowing rather than pushing through. You can go instead to what your feet are pressing…
If you are going to bring attention to your body, start with where your body is rather than what it feels. Feet on the floor, back against the chair, the weight of your hands in your lap.
Attention to the inside, the chest, the stomach, the throat, sits close to the emotional wiring and can open more than you meant to open. Position in…
Your nervous system decides whether a room is safe before you have had a single thought about it. Tone of voice, a face, the way someone walks in: it reads all of that and answers underneath your awareness.
This is why you can leave a perfectly pleasant meeting wrung out, or take against someone who has done nothing you could point to. The reading is…
The reading happens without you, but you can catch up to it. Naming what your body has already concluded, out loud or in your head, is most of the work.
Something like: my shoulders came up when he walked in. That is all it needs to be. You are not deciding yet whether it was fair, you are bringing a…
An alarm system can be wrong in two directions. It can scream in a safe room, and it can stay silent somewhere it should not.
Most talk about trauma assumes the first: too much alarm, too often. But some people come out of hard years with the volume turned right down,…
One question does a lot of work: is what my body is doing right now a fair match for what is actually in front of me? Ask it plainly, and let the answer be either yes or no.
The point is not to talk yourself out of the feeling. The signal is information and it deserves a hearing. But you can hold it up against the room…
You do not have to close your eyes. If keeping them open, soft and lowered, is what lets you stay in the room, that is the better version for you.
Closing your eyes takes away your ability to check the room, and for anyone whose body is used to watching, that costs more than it gives. Make it an…
The body answers in sensations, in pictures, in a mood that turns up without explanation. If no words come when you check in, nothing has gone wrong.
People often decide they are bad at this because they went looking for a sentence and found a tight jaw instead. The tight jaw is the answer. Take…
If a few quiet minutes with your body turn up an ache or a tightness you had not noticed before, the practice has not made things worse. It has shown you something that was already there.
This catches a lot of people out. They sit down hoping to feel calmer, meet a knot in the stomach instead, and decide the whole thing is not for…
If you are moving attention through the body, start at the feet and work up. Leave the throat, the chest and the face until last.
The far edges of the body carry less charge, so they are a gentle place to find your bearings. Include the back, which people tend to skip: attention…
There is a difference between watching your hand and being in your hand. See whether you can move from looking at a part of your body to living inside it.
Observing keeps a small distance, which is useful early on and can quietly become the whole practice. Inhabiting is the further step: filling the…
Say it plainly whenever you teach anything: the way I am showing you this is not the way it has to be done. Change it until it works for you.
Anyone who has failed at the standard version of something several times will not try again unless they are told clearly that adapting it is allowed.…
If talking about feelings has always felt foreign or a bit embarrassing, treat this as a once a day checklist instead. Five boxes, no discussion, nothing to perform.
Plenty of people who go blank at how are you feeling can tell you straight away whether their shoulders are tight or their breathing is shallow.…
Before you walk into a room with someone, ask what you are carrying in with you, and what you are likely to leave behind when you go.
State travels ahead of words. A hard conversation an hour ago, a bad night, a piece of news you have not dealt with: any of it will be in the room…
Ask who you are today and what body you are living in today, and let the answer be different from yesterday's. You are more fluid than solid.
Hard experience tends to freeze a person into a description: the damaged one, the difficult one, the one who cannot cope. Asking the question daily…
Whenever you offer a standing practice, offer the seated version in the same breath, and mean it. Say plainly that people should look after their own bodies and change anything that does not suit them.
Say it before you begin, not afterwards, so that nobody has to interrupt to ask. If you cannot see the people you are guiding, say that too, and say…
Before twisting, draw your belly gently in towards your spine. It looks after your lower back, and it is worth feeling for its own sake: you steady the middle before you turn towards anything.
The physical version is simple. A light drawing in of the abdomen, not a clench, held while you rotate and released as you come back. The felt…
Offer any movement in three sizes: small, medium and full. Let people take the one that fits today, and let them change their mind halfway through.
For a twist that might be a simple reach, or a reach with the other hand placed behind, or loose swinging arms. The three sizes do quiet work. They…
Learn one plain standing position and keep coming back to it: feet under hips, hips under shoulders, ears above shoulders, chin drawn back a little, arms hanging.
The point is not that this posture is correct. It is that having one shape you return to gives you something to measure by, so you can tell that…
When you offer someone a practice, ask them to tell you if it did nothing, and mean it. Say out loud that plenty of these do not land.
People agree that things helped for all sorts of reasons: not wanting to seem difficult, not wanting to disappoint you, having learned long ago that…
Practise with the noise on, at least some of the time. The quiet room is not where you are going to need the skill.
A calm that only exists in a silent house is not much use in an open plan office or a kitchen at teatime. Once you can settle in the quiet, do a…
Once a day, go from head to feet and notice what is there. A good deal of what you find will be plain need: thirsty, hungry, needing the loo, needing to stand up.
When you get absorbed in something these signals go unheard for hours, and then you wonder why you feel dreadful by four o'clock. The scan is dull,…
Brain imaging does show that practice changes something. Be careful with anyone who tells you a great deal more than that.
It genuinely helps to know that sitting and breathing is not nothing, particularly if you have been told your whole life to just try harder. It also…
In muscle relaxation you are usually told to let go slowly. If slow leaves you fidgeting, let go all at once. The version you will keep doing is the better version.
The standard sequence is to tense a muscle group, hold it, then release gradually, and for some people that long release is unbearable to sit…
Your eyes are an input too. A photo of someone who loves you and a plain soft coloured wall will settle you; a busy bright screen will lift you.
Hardly anyone thinks to arrange what is in front of them, and it is one of the easier things to change. Put a picture where you actually sit. Turn…
Once a day, run through five things in order: how your mind is, what your body feels, how the breathing is going, what the emotional weather is, and how much energy you have. Curious, not marking yourself.
The order matters more than the answers do. Without a set path, checking in with yourself slides easily into chewing over the same worry, and you…
The same check-in can take two minutes or fifteen. Match the length to the day you are actually having, not to the version you were taught.
A long deep look inward is not always the better one. On a day when you are already far from yourself, going deeper can take you further out rather…
Finish a check-in by asking what actually brought you here. Not the task in front of you, the thing underneath it that you want.
Noticing how you are can leave you sitting in it. One more question turns it outward: what am I hoping for, what am I moving towards. It might be…
Take the spine through all six of its movements: forward, back, bending to each side, turning to each side. Standing or sitting, it takes under five minutes.
Doing the whole set matters more than doing any one of them beautifully. Left to ourselves we skip the direction that feels stiff or guarded, and…
Posture does not only show what you feel, it decides what you can feel. Anger is very hard to reach with a collapsed chest, and grief is hard to reach when you are held rigidly upright.
If a feeling seems to be nowhere at all, look at the shape you are sitting in before deciding it is absent. Let the chest open a little, or let a…
Once a movement is familiar, drop the pattern. Let it curve and wander towards wherever your body seems to want it, rather than doing it correctly.
Following instructions well is a skill many people learned early, sometimes because it was not safe to do anything else. A practice made entirely of…
Instead of breathing deeply in general, pick the place that feels tight, the front of the ribs, the chest, one shoulder, and send the breath there.
You are not really moving air into your shoulder, but putting your attention there while you breathe does two things: you start to feel that area in…
After movement, take a moment on five things: the quality of your mind, of the sensation in your body, of your breathing, of your mood, and of your energy.
Doing this after moving rather than before gives you something to notice, since the body has just changed. Over time it builds a vocabulary. People…
End a check-in with a question rather than a summary: what do I need in order to be properly here today?
Noticing your state can leave you stuck in reporting on yourself. The need question turns it into something you can act on, and the answer is often…
If sitting still with your eyes closed has never worked, do it moving. Walking, washing up, gardening: the exercise is the same, and there is something to hold on to.
Sitting meditation asks for the hardest possible version of the task, sustained inward attention with nothing outside to grip. Attach attention to…
If your child is learning to settle, learn it alongside them rather than supervising. Parents who practise report less stress of their own and less flying off the handle.
Attention difficulties run in families, so the adult in the room is often working with much the same wiring at the end of a longer day. Practising…