Backing out brings relief within seconds, and that relief is exactly what teaches the fear to come back bigger. The cost is paid later, which is why it is so easy to miss.

If attention and planning are already hard work for you, then the very tools for handling anxiety are the things you find difficult. That is not a failure to try. It means the plan needs more scaffolding and more repetition.

With heavy phone use the telling thing is not the hours. It is what happens when the phone is out of reach, and whether the checking feels urgent rather than enjoyable.

When you assess a young person, take a reading of the adults as well: what they understand about the world their child lives in, and how comfortable they are in it.