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Areas › Your marriage › Shared spiritual life
When we are older, the home we are making. Language that assumes a shared road ahead.
They pray, our Lord, grant us joy in our spouses and offspring (Qur'an 25:74). To speak of a shared future is to pray it, softly.
الفرقان
وَٱلَّذِينَ يَقُولُونَ رَبَّنَا هَبۡ لَنَا مِنۡ أَزۡوَٰجِنَا وَذُرِّيَّٰتِنَا قُرَّةَ أَعۡيُنࣲ وَٱجۡعَلۡنَا لِلۡمُتَّقِينَ إِمَامًا
those who pray, ‘Our Lord, give us joy in our spouses and offspring. Make us good examples to those who are aware of You’
Qur’an 25:74read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
Gottman's shared meaning includes the language a couple uses about what is ahead. Speaking of the future as ours assumes a shared road, and saying it aloud strengthens the commitment it describes.
John M. Gottman; Nan Silver (1999). The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work. Crown
Principle 7, Create Shared Meaning. Marriage has a spiritual dimension built from rituals of connection, shared roles, goals and symbols, and a couple with a common sense of purpose weathers conflict that would otherwise divide them.
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
Speaking of a shared future signals and strengthens commitment.
Where this sits: Gottman method, Create Shared Meaning; speaking of a shared future as we.