Loading practices
Loading practices
Areas › Yourself and your limits › Hold a boundary
Saying yes to everything is a slow way of letting yourself down. Protect your real priorities.
Do not contribute to your own destruction with your own hands (Quran 2:195). Over-committing until you break is a harm you are asked to avoid.
البقرة
وَأَنفِقُواْ فِي سَبِيلِ ٱللَّهِ وَلَا تُلۡقُواْ بِأَيۡدِيكُمۡ إِلَى ٱلتَّهۡلُكَةِ وَأَحۡسِنُوٓاْۚ إِنَّ ٱللَّهَ يُحِبُّ ٱلۡمُحۡسِنِينَ
Spend in God’s cause: do not contribute to your destruction with your own hands, but do good, for God loves those who do good
Qur’an 2:195read it in the library
Translation: M.A.S. Abdel Haleem, The Qur'an, Oxford University Press, 2004.
Balanced assertiveness, neither passive nor domineering, protects your time and standing; agreeing to everything erodes both, and resentment usually follows.
Ames, D. R. and Flynn, F. J. (2007). What breaks a leader: The curvilinear relation between assertiveness and leadership. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology doi
Both too little and too much assertiveness carry costs; a moderate, balanced level is most effective.
Strength of evidence: one line of research. A single study, or a theoretical account.
Declining what does not fit protects the energy your genuine commitments need.
Where this sits: DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness, self-respect (FAST).