Loading practices
Loading practices
Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.
Every feeling comes with something it wants you to do. Catching the move before you make it is most of the skill.
Anger wants to push, fear wants to get out of the room, sadness wants to curl up, shame wants to disappear. None of that is wrong, and the trouble is…
You do not need a long list of feeling words. Half a dozen you can actually reach for under pressure will do more than forty you have to look up.
Angry, sad, afraid, ashamed, surprised, glad is enough to start with, and most hard moments are some mixture of the first four. The aim is not to…
You cannot ask for something you cannot feel the want of. Before working out how to say it, spend a minute finding what you actually need.
This is why advice to communicate better so often goes nowhere. The words come out tidy and land as nothing, because there was no felt need inside…
Nobody ever came for help because they were too happy. What arrives as irritation or flatness on the surface is usually fear, grief or shame underneath.
So when someone snaps at you, or when you go cold and clipped yourself, treat that as the top layer rather than the whole story. The useful question…
Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.
Go back to the second before you reacted. Not the argument, not the history, just that one second and what crossed you in it.
Most people have to genuinely search for the answer, and the searching is where the work happens rather than in whatever they eventually say.…