Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

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28 practices

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A deadline you privately know is soft has no pull at all. If six o'clock really means midnight, then ten in the morning means nothing, and the whole day drifts until the panic arrives.

One man working from home lost his evenings this way for years, and it was his relationship rather than his employer that paid for it. If the true…

Five minutesStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 78:10One line of research

Before planning anything, work out which date is actually true. Does Thursday mean Thursday, or does everybody know it means Friday, and is Thursday even possible?

Planning against a date you do not believe in is planning against nothing, and you will feel that in how little the plan moves you. Get the real one…

Five minutesStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 30:18One line of research

When you set your own deadline, watch what happens to it. Thursday becomes Friday, Friday becomes Monday, and it helps to know what that slide actually costs rather than guessing at it.

Keep a light record for a few weeks. Three things only: the date you picked, the date it was done, and one line on what the gap cost you. Sometimes…

Five minutesStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 65:3One line of research

Anything with more than one step gets written down, and the child does the writing. Ten problems, check them against the answers, correct what is wrong: three lines in their own hand.

A handout would carry the same words, but writing it themselves does two extra things. It puts the sequence somewhere they can look again when step…

Five minutesStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 73:6

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.

Growing empathy

Breathing

Being seen and judged

Shame and stigma

Making it stick

Structure and routine

Remembering to do it

Tolerate distress

Knowing your partner

Treatment and medication

What worry does

Answering bids

Breaking the worry loop

What you are actually defending

Feeling from the inside

When you use something to cope

Emotions as signals

Repair after rupture

Facing it a step at a time

Shared spiritual life

Rebuilding trust

Fondness and admiration

Affection and touch

Obsessions and compulsions

Shame

Posture and how you carry yourself

Listening and understanding

Righteous anger and perfectionism

Rituals of connection

Anger, alcohol and the body

The cost of avoiding

Rest and pacing

Living with uncertainty

When you go numb

When anger turns to harm

Meaning after harm

Letting it out safely

Notice the pattern and flex

Let the wave come

Your worth is not conditional

Act on your values

Working with anger

Get it out of your head

Ride the urge

Patience and trust

Validate yourself and others

Your window of tolerance

Reading, numbers and learning differences

Care for yourself in loss

Keep the bond

Hold a boundary

Ask and say no well

Help someone grieving

One line of research

Put the rules up on the wall where everyone can see them, and put the child's own version on a card on their desk.

A rule that lives only in memory is not there in the second it is needed, which is the second something more interesting has just walked past. A card…

Five minutesStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 11:114One line of research

A calendar that catches only some of your commitments is more dangerous than no calendar at all. You look at Thursday, see a clear afternoon, say yes, and only later meet the thing that never got written down.

So the first job is not a better app. It is one place where everything goes, without exception, including the small things you are certain you will…

Twenty minutesStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 65:3One line of research

Put the demanding work where the energy is, not where the timetable happens to be convenient. Then alternate it with something they like, and break it up often.

Effort runs down fast, so an hour of hard work in one block will give you good minutes at the start and very little after. Cut it into shorter runs…

Twenty minutesStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 17:78One line of research

Where you can, let the learning be something done rather than something sat through. Typing instead of writing, a calculator instead of longhand, a built model instead of an essay.

The knowledge is usually already there. What fails is showing it through a long, still, low feedback task, and that is the part worth redesigning.…

LongerStructure and routineADHD skillsQur’an 22:78One line of research