Practices

Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.

What matches

15 practices

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Three moves, in this order: notice what is happening, settle the body, then put your attention somewhere useful. Short enough to remember when you are already going.

Elaborate plans fall apart at exactly the moment you need them, so it is worth having something this small. Notice covers naming it as anxiety rather…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 2:45One line of research

Slow breathing and loosening your muscles are not decoration. A body that is braced keeps telling the mind there is something to brace for, so unbracing it takes away part of the evidence.

If this sounds like soft advice, try it as a technical one instead: long slow breaths out, shoulders down, jaw unclenched, and give it a few minutes…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 20:130One line of research

Settling the body only goes so far for some people, and there is energy left over afterwards. That leftover needs somewhere to go, or it goes back into the worry.

This matters most if you run hot: the driven ones, the ones who cannot leave a thought alone. You do the breathing, you are still humming, and you…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 11:114One line of research

Asking again and again whether it will be alright, and being told yes, buys a few seconds of calm and guarantees the next round of asking. The kindness in the answer is what keeps it going.

You can hear it in the shape of the question: the same one, worded slightly differently, asked of the same person. If you are the one being asked,…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 6:59

Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.

Breathing

Reading, numbers and learning differences

Structure and routine

The moment before you snap

Remembering to do it

Facing it a step at a time

Food, caffeine and fuel

When anger turns to harm

When you use something to cope

Making it stick

Righteous anger and perfectionism

Self-compassion

Growing empathy

Choosing your response

Emotions as signals

When everything feels flat

Tolerate distress

Shame

Getting assessed and diagnosed

Being seen and judged

Obsessions and compulsions

Anger, alcohol and the body

Practising under provocation

Feeling from the inside

Living with uncertainty

Letting it out safely

Use your strengths

Touch and bodywork

Help someone grieving

Rest and pacing

Question the thought

One line of research

When two options are both decent, there is no right answer waiting to be found. The work is not in picking. It is in doing well by whichever one you pick.

Bright, anxious people stall for exactly this reason: the options really are close, so no amount of further thinking separates them. Set a time to…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 65:3One line of research

Most decisions are not sealed. Choose, run with it for a set time, then look again and change course if it is clearly wrong. Knowing there is a review date takes a great deal of weight off the choice.

The weight comes from treating the decision as permanent, which almost none of them are. Put an actual date in the diary for the review. That gives…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 18:24One line of research

A hammering heart during anxiety is the body doing what it does when it is braced, not a sign that it is being damaged. For a lot of people that single piece of information is the thing that finally lets the panic drop.

The fear of the sensation is usually the bigger half of the problem: the heart races, you read it as something going badly wrong, and the fear feeds…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 39:42One line of research

Every worry has something you love sitting underneath it. Fear about the exam means you want to do well. Fear about your mother's drive home means she matters to you.

This does not make the worry pleasant, and it is not a trick to make it disappear. What it does is stop the second layer, the part where you are…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 3:191One line of research

Say the coping sentence aloud instead of thinking it. Some people generate very little of that inner commentary on their own, and hearing it in the room does the job the inner voice was supposed to do.

Out loud, in your own words, something like: my brain is doing the thing again, this is chemistry, it is here because I care. Say it in the car, in…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 33:41One line of research

You will not talk a driven person out of worrying, so give the worry a better job. If someone frets about their revision, have them fret about whether they are also taking breaks and sleeping, since those are part of the revision.

This works because it uses the drive rather than fighting it. The same conscientiousness that produces the twelfth hour at the desk will produce a…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 73:8One line of research

A great many people worry silently and look perfectly calm doing it. Families are often astonished to find out how much has been going on.

If someone in your house goes quiet, spends longer alone, or seems flat rather than agitated, that can be worry rather than indifference. You will…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 114:5One line of research

Some people never ask for help because they assume everyone's head is like theirs. If yours has been running like this since you were small, it does not feel like a condition. It feels like being you.

It is worth asking someone you trust, plainly, how often they worry about things and for how long. The answer is often surprising. Discovering that a…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 13:28One line of research

Sourness, shutting down, snapping at everyone: these are as often worry as they are attitude. The person is not giving you a hard time, they are having one.

This matters because of what happens next. Read it as rudeness and the house responds with punishment, which adds to the load that produced the…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 41:36One line of research

When you help someone rethink a frightening thought, go slowly and stay honest. A cheerful line swapped in for a scared one tends to get refused, and fairly so.

The aim is not a brighter thought but a truer one that is also bearable. Something in the shape of "this is going to feel horrible and I can get…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 3:159One line of research

Before you go towards the thing you are afraid of, it helps to have two things to hand: a way to settle your body, and a fairer account of what is likely to happen.

Neither of them is meant to take the fear away. They are there so you can stay in the situation long enough for it to teach you something, and that…

Five minutesBreaking the worry loopCBTQur’an 2:153One line of research