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AreasFocus, starting, and ADHD

Focus, starting, and ADHD

Most advice about focus is written for a brain that starts easily. This area is not. It covers what ADHD actually is, how to make a start when starting is the hard part, how to bring a future consequence close enough to feel, and how to stop paying for it in shame.

What works for this

Implementation intentions

Putting things off is mood repair rather than laziness: delay removes the bad feeling straight away and the cost lands later. So the move is not more willpower, it is a plan specific enough to run without a decision.

One move, today

Write one sentence: when it is [time] and I am at [place], I will [the first small action]. Naming when and where is the part the evidence supports.

What matches

112 practices

Narrow these down

Ask what they think this will cost them in effort, then say what you think. People rarely give up because a strategy failed. They give up because it turned out to be harder than anyone had told them.

Be specific about the first fortnight, since that is when it is worst and the payoff has not arrived yet. Someone who expected a small effort and met…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 18:69One line of research

When something did not get done, find out which half broke. Did they not know what to do or when? Or was the plan fine, and the moment for doing it came and went?

Ask for the last time it happened, hour by hour, up to the point where it did not happen. A planning failure needs somewhere reliable to catch tasks…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 91:8One line of research

Awareness is knowing what needs doing and when. Motivation is doing it once you know. Nearly every app on the market solves the first one, which is why buying another one so rarely helps.

Test it with one question: at the moment it did not happen, did you know? If the answer is yes, the reminder was never the missing piece, and a…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 20:25One line of research

Carry the rough proportions into every ADHD assessment. Executive function difficulty in the great majority, coordination difficulty in around half, dyslexia in something like a quarter to two fifths. A workup that never asks about handwriting, sport or reading is not finished.

The behaviour problem you were called about is often the visible end of an unidentified reading or coordination difficulty. Ask what PE is like, what…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 16:43One line of research

Parents with one affected child often ask what they might do differently before the next one. Answer honestly: there are lists of suggestions in circulation, the evidence behind most of them is thin, and the question underneath is usually about blame.

Take the question seriously and take the guilt seriously alongside it. Give what is genuinely known, say plainly where recommendations run ahead of…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 2:286One line of research

Keep the tasks short, a couple of minutes each, with results back the same day. A long test given to a child who cannot sustain attention measures how long they can last, not the thing you were trying to measure.

Brevity is not a convenience you are allowing yourself. It is what keeps the data honest, and it keeps the child willing for whatever you ask next.…

Five minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 65:7One line of research

Ask about food two generations back. What the parents were like about it, what the grandparents were like, what the rules were at the table.

Much of how a person eats was learned long before anybody mentioned a diagnosis, and a fair amount of the shame around it was learned in the same…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 49:13One line of research

The scales worth using are the ones that ask about situations rather than symptoms alone. Home, school, work, and what actually happens in each.

A questionnaire counting how often somebody loses their keys will label half the population. What a diagnosis needs is evidence that the difficulty…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 24:61One line of research

Executive function scales ask how the week actually went. That is often more use than an afternoon of testing in a quiet room.

Office testing happens in the best conditions a person will ever meet: no interruptions, someone sitting with them, a clear finish line in sight.…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 39:9One line of research

Ask about the family properly: parents, brothers and sisters, children, then aunts, uncles and grandparents. Include drinking and drug use, in them as well as in the person sitting with you.

This tends to be the highest yield few minutes of an assessment, because the condition runs strongly in families. Relatives who were never assessed…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 12:87One line of research

The family history is not the warm up before the real assessment. Give it proper time and it will often tell you more than any single rating scale in the folder.

Walk through the family rather than asking one summary question about it. Who struggled at school, who could never sit through a meal, who changed…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 49:13One line of research

'I am disorganised' cannot be treated. 'The post piles up on the hall table until something ends up with a debt collector' can. Spend the time getting the problem down to something that specific.

Push for the particulars: which task, which moment, what was happening just before, what they did instead. Where you can, ask someone who was there…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedADHD skillsQur’an 2:31One line of research

Run the assessment yourself and watch while they work. Under real effort you will see the small movements, the tics and the overflow that never appear in ordinary conversation, and none of it reaches you if a technician or an app does the testing.

Sit where you can see hands and face. Note what happens as the task gets harder: the tongue that comes out, the leg that starts going, the free hand…

Twenty minutesGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 3:159One line of research

Processing speed is the stubborn one. It shifts a little with repeated, rhythmically paced practice and hardly at all with explanation, so say that to a family at the start rather than when they are disappointed.

Teaching a strategy will not make a slow processor quick, and telling a child to hurry up only makes the work more unpleasant. Graded practice with…

LongerGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 18:69One line of research

Assess, make a plan, do the work, and then keep measuring while you do it. Without that last part you have no way of knowing whether to push harder, change direction or stop.

Use more than one stream: your own measures, what parents notice at home, what school reports, and what the child says about it. Children will tell…

LongerGetting assessed and diagnosedCoreQur’an 42:38One line of research

You can screen for a processing difficulty with no test at all. Just notice, in ordinary conversation, whether the child is answering what you actually said.

A child who drifts off topic, answers a slightly different question, or needs things said twice may not be avoiding you or daydreaming. The words may…

A minuteReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 20:28One line of research

Clapping games, skipping rhymes and silly verses are worth doing. They are good for the ear and they cost nothing, but they will not on their own repair a reading difficulty, and it is kinder to say so early.

Play the games, and separately get the structured teaching that a child with a real decoding problem needs. Families are often told that rhyming…

Five minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 2:185One line of research

Invent words together. Say a made up word, pull it apart into its sounds, put it back, then take one sound out and hear what is left. The nonsense is the point, because there is nothing for memory to fall back on.

With a real word, a child who cannot work with sounds can often get by on memory, and you learn nothing about what they can actually do. A made up…

Five minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 2:31One line of research

Plenty of children read the equals sign as put the answer here. Write it the other way round sometimes, eight equals three plus five, so they meet the idea that both sides are simply the same amount.

Move the sign about. Leave the gap in the middle, four plus something equals two plus five, and watch what the child does with it. If they add…

Five minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 2:32One line of research

The word one does several jobs at once: a digit, a number, a single object, a whole set. A child who has not sorted those out will put figures in the wrong columns and later read a third as a number instead of a part of something.

When digits land in the wrong place, check whether the child knows what is being counted before calling it carelessness. Say the unit out loud: one…

Five minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 24:61One line of research

Ask someone to repeat a made up word and memory cannot rescue them. That is exactly why this small task keeps finding difficulties a clever, well practised person hides everywhere else.

Real words can be recalled, and a strong memory will lift a score without the skill underneath being there at all. A word that has never existed…

Five minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 43:52One line of research

Phonological awareness is not one skill. Telling sounds apart, rhyming, breaking a word into its sounds and blending them back are separate jobs, and a child can be fine at one and stuck at another.

Before agreeing that a child needs phonics, find out which piece is missing. Ask them to say the sounds in cat, then to join up sounds you give them,…

Twenty minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 55:4One line of research

A display organised by sound rather than by alphabet gives a child more to hold on to. Let them feel where each sound is made, lips, tongue, teeth, and match that to the letters that spell it.

Reading is learned from speech towards print, so a border running A, B, C tells a child very little about what they are actually doing. Grouping by…

Twenty minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 26:13One line of research

Before drilling number facts, check whether the child has any feel for how much a number is. Which pile is bigger, is eight nearer to ten or to two, give me three of those.

A child with no sense of quantity can still learn to recite that seven and eight make fifteen, and it will be a string of sounds attached to nothing.…

Twenty minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 16:78One line of research

Build numbers and break them up again. Seven is five and two, and also six and one, and a child who can see that has the thing mental arithmetic is made of.

Blocks, buttons, coins, anything you can push into two piles and back together. Ask which numbers fit inside other numbers and let the child show you…

Twenty minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 87:8One line of research

Patterns sit underneath both reading and arithmetic. Blue, red, green, blue, red, green: making a sequence, copying it, then breaking it on purpose builds the ordering that words and numbers both run on.

Use blocks, beads, claps, a drum, anything with an order to it. Ask the child to make the same pattern, then to spoil it deliberately and tell you…

Twenty minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 20:25One line of research

Find something the child already loves, a team, an orchestra, a game, and lay their results over it. These players are strong, these ones need coaching, and none of it means the team is no good.

Feedback lands very differently when the low scores are players who need training rather than facts about who someone is. Do it with their own…

Twenty minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 30:22One line of research

In practice, you sometimes have to stop a child using the trick that has kept them afloat, so the weaker skill finally gets used. Expect them to hate it for a while.

If memorising is doing the work, the part that should be doing it never gets a turn. So build short pieces of practice where the workaround is simply…

Twenty minutesReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 94:5One line of research

Ask a struggling ten year old what division actually is and you will often get a blank, or a method with no meaning under it. Going back to what each operation does is usually worth more than another go at this term's work.

Division is sharing out, or taking the same amount away again and again until nothing is left. Multiplication is that same amount repeated. Children…

LongerReading, numbers and learning differencesCoreQur’an 18:69One line of research

The most useful question about a dose is whether the person can tell. A shrug and 'I think it sort of helps a bit' usually means it is not yet doing its job.

At a dose that suits them, most people can say when it comes on, what the middle of the day feels like, and when it leaves. Vagueness points…

A minuteMedication and how it worksADHD skillsQur’an 53:28One line of research

Half the useful health information arrives sideways. Someone says 'I am so tired' on the way into another subject, and that is an opening worth taking gently.

People rarely bring sleep or food to a session as a topic, because they do not file them as symptoms. So the tiredness, the skipped meals and the…

A minuteMedication and how it worksADHD skillsQur’an 21:83One line of research

Pill swallowing can be taught in a few short sessions with sweets. Start with the tiniest ones, give two to eat for every one swallowed whole, and work up in size across a week.

Keep each session short and cheerful and stop before anyone is upset, since one frightening attempt can set the whole thing back weeks. For capsules,…

Five minutesMedication and how it worksMedical and treatmentQur’an 2:185One line of research

Being given a medicine that holds no licence for your condition can feel like being experimented on. Usually it means the evidence is decent but thinner than a licence demands.

Bupropion is the common case. It helps some people with attention difficulties, often alongside a stimulant, and it never gained the indication, so…

Five minutesMedication and how it worksMedical and treatmentQur’an 17:36One line of research

Debt, impulsive spending, an account that never quite recovers: this belongs in the conversation about attention rather than in a separate drawer marked shame.

People hide this part longer than anything else, which means it is usually the last thing to get any help. If you are the one struggling, saying it…

Five minutesMedication and how it worksMedical and treatmentQur’an 33:5One line of research

Before you explain anything about medication, ask what the person already believes about it. You cannot correct a worry that has never been said out loud.

Most people arrive carrying something: a cousin who could not sleep, a headline, a parent with a strong view. Lead with your own information and you…

Five minutesMedication and how it worksMedical and treatmentQur’an 42:38One line of research

In practice the non-stimulants turn up more often as an addition than on their own. A stimulant in the morning with guanfacine alongside it is a common shape.

The two act at different points of the same circuit, so they tend to complement rather than repeat each other, and the blood pressure effect of one…

Five minutesMedication and how it worksMedical and treatmentQur’an 42:38One line of research

Where anxiety sits alongside the attention difficulty, a non-stimulant is sometimes the better first choice. Stimulants sharpen anxiety in some people, and that is a hard trade to live with.

The same holds when blood pressure rises on a stimulant that is otherwise working, since adding an alpha-2 agent can make it possible to keep the…

Five minutesMedication and how it worksMedical and treatmentQur’an 21:83One line of research

A small short-acting dose in the afternoon, on top of the long-acting one, is ordinary practice rather than a special case. Homework and the evening drive often fall outside what the morning dose still reaches.

The hours when you most need to hold back are frequently the hours the medicine has stopped covering. Raising the morning dose to solve an early…

Five minutesMedication and how it worksMedical and treatmentQur’an 73:20One line of research

These are among the best studied medicines in psychiatry, in use for decades. Most of the hesitancy around them traces back to how they get covered in the press rather than to the safety record.

Saying that is not the same as saying there is nothing to watch. Heart rate and blood pressure shift a little, appetite and sleep often need…

Five minutesMedication and how it worksMedical and treatmentQur’an 49:6One line of research

For a family stuck on whether to medicate at all, the comparison with diabetes often unlocks something. Nobody manages diabetes on diet alone, and nobody calls insulin a moral failure.

Offered gently it moves the question from what kind of parent am I towards what does this condition need. Played as a trump card it makes people…

Five minutesMedication and how it worksMedical and treatmentQur’an 16:69One line of research

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