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Every practice in the library, in one list. Narrow it by how long you have, who it is written for, and where you are right now.
When a fight starts, name the pattern you both fall into, not the fault in them.
We are doing the thing where I push and you go quiet. The cycle is the enemy, not you.
Catch the cycle one move earlier today, before it picks up speed.
The first tightening, the first sharp word. Name it there, when it is still small.
Name your own move in the dance today: I chase when I am scared, or I go quiet.
Not their part. Yours. Owning your step in the pattern is what starts to change it.
Say it out loud in the next argument: it is us against this pattern, not me against you.
Realign the sides. The two of you on one team, the cycle on the other.
Notice if one of you chases and one retreats, and name that gently.
The more I push, the more you pull back, and round it goes. See the loop, out loud.
Looking for a whole subject rather than a single practice? Start from the nine areas.
If you both go silent and distant, name the freeze rather than waiting it out.
We have both gone quiet and cold. One of us has to reach first. Let it be you.